In our post Overwhelmed or Over Busy, we discussed the importance of prioritizing what truly needs to be done by you and what would be best to delegate.

Since that post, several of you have written to us saying, “I need help delegating!” Not just new managers, but established managers often struggle with delegating effectively.

We hear you, and before we discuss delegating, we’d like to get back to the basics of team building. It’s far easier to delegate to a team with whom you are connected and have mutual respect.

Whether you were recently promoted, just joined a company as a manager, or have been managing your team for a while, we have three strategies to support you claiming (or establishing) your role as a leader or manager.

The most successful leaders know
the importance of starting off new relationships right
AND nurturing existing ones.

The three strategies that the best leaders use to enter an organizational system and establish themselves in their role are gratitudecuriosity, and respect.


  • As you meet with your team, let them know that you’re excited and grateful to be working closely with them as individuals and as a team.
  • Convey that you trust that together you can set a course that will continue their current success, add to their impact, work toward getting the resources needed to succeed, and make the department a great place to work.
  • Frame the conversation in the “we” rather than “I” to engage them in being a solution on behalf of the department and organization.
  • Sharing your gratitude for them and their work will invite them to work with you to create success. Some will show up with higher energy and engagement because you’re painting a picture of a future where, together, we can succeed.
  • Demonstrate that you’re grateful to be in the position to support and contribute to their success, and that you’ll be working with them to achieve it, not positioning yourself to be a sole shining star. 


  • Seek to connect with those you’re leading so that you can create engaging and connecting conversations. The goal is to understand more about the people you’re working with, not grill them on who they are.
  • Ask questions like the ones below with warmth and kindness and you’ll have some rich conversations.
    • What brought you to this organization/department?
    • What type of management style helps you thrive?
    • How do you like to be recognized for your contributions and successes?
    • What can I do to support you in being successful in your role?
    • What motivates you in your work?
  • The goal of curiosity is to find out what you don’t know. Asking questions with genuine interest is the best way to learn what’s working, what’s not working, and what could be better. 


  • Whether you’re new to the position, or have been there a while, being respectful of decisions let’s your team know that you realize they did what they thought best at the time
    • If you’re new, you’ll be checking in on decisions that were made before you were there.
    • If you’re not new, respect is a great tool to use for post-project reviews.
  • As a lead-in for any of the below questions, saying something like, “I’m impressed with all of the great work you/this team has been doing and really appreciate your efforts. To understand things better, I’d like to learn about what went into your decisions and how they were made.”
    • I’m curious about what each of you knows about the history or background of this effort, project, process, system, etc.
    • Can you describe to me what the key factors were that went into the direction or decision?
    • What do you see as the benefits of this current project, process, system, direction, etc? What are the concerns that need to be addressed? What suggestions do you have to make it better?

The world is changing, and people need to know that they’re acknowledged and appreciated for all that they bring to the table.

When you show up with gratitude, curiosity, and respect,
you’re letting your team know
that you’re their ally
and that you’ll create success, together.

Think about these three areas and see if you can start a conversation today. We’ll see you next week where we’ll talk about how to successfully delegate.

Please let us know if we can be helpful.

If you’d like support connecting with your team, contact us today.